so a year ago, i had already written V&C: BKBT. i had done it in an unheard of (so i've been told) 44 hours. i revised in the next two weeks and 3 days before going to print i added a new beginning of chapter 1. i hunted out all (3) canadian agents. i hunted out some closer american agents. i got rejections, lots of them. i know that somewhere out there are desks my stuff is still sitting on because they get hundreds to read a day. i know that stephanie meyers twilight was on somebody's desk for 2 years before anyone read it.
i had gotten some interest but some wanted me to take out way too many words and i knew i couldn't work like that. my voice has to be written as is. i am still getting feedback on agents i contacted in feb last year.
so this month i have to devote, yet again, more time to hunt out agents, redo the ones i did last year (and some of those i contacted 3 or 4 times). time to expand more emails and snail mails in the states and the u.k. because they have tons of agents there. i know rejections are part of it and i expect them. i talked to one author and she said she had enough rejections to wallpaper a room but encouraged me to keep going. so i am. so far i reckon i have spent more on paper, ink, stamps, envelopes etc to send stuff out than i made on sales of the book.
this month i have to pound it into some heads that this story is something no one else has ever written before, a viewpoint no one has ever read.
i have to have faith that things will work out. i have to believe in me for a change and know that i deserve this because it's something that maybe, just maybe, i was born to do. i have to stop getting disgruntled when people tell you that they will buy your book and then don't. i have to stop taking things like that personally.
i have to learn that people are not against me, just not always honest with me. i have to not give up and let things happen as they may sometimes. i have to learn that everything happens for a reason and if it's meant to be, then i will succeed and if it isn't then i will continue to write the series until the end and give it to my grandchildren.
and above all, i have to learn patience. not everything can happen as fast as i wrote BKBT. maybe i should have taken a year to write it. i am taking it slower with the second book but i have already started the third and i have written the ending of the series. no patience. i am pretty sure that by the end of 2012 i will have the entire series written, all seven books.
patience? fuck patience :o)
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